I am so disgusted with myself that i haven't kept an eye on my DA account. It's been so long since i last checked my messages etc, not that there was anything of importance but still.

It's been a long few months i can tell you. First there was the disappointment of getting an e-mail from Ucas telling me my status had changed. I felt extremely sick when i got that e mail because i knew for certain it wasn't going to be good news and as usual i was right. Maybe it's the pessimist in me but whenever something bad is going to happen i always have this gut feeling. Ah well. Anyway, i wasn't accepted for 2nd Year at Grays, so that was a right bloody bummer. I took it better than i thought i would though, there was a crying spell but then i decided to pull myself together and stop being a baby. Really, where was crying going to get me? So i sat down and had a long hard think about whether art really was what i wanted and i always came to the same conclusion. Yes. So instead of feeling sorry for myself i went out and did something about it.

I got myself an interview for the dude who is in charge of the first years, visited him and he liked my stuff. Saw potential, said i had a good eye for this and that and then told me he was going to see someone in Admissions. Several weeks later still no word, then my lecturers got involved and there were many phone calls, at one point i had to take pics of my work and e mail them to the guy, but to cut a very long story short, i WILL be going to Art school in September, it's 1st year, which is disappointing but it's better than nothing and i'm going to show them that i do have talent and i'll be working my arse off.

We also had our end of year Exhibition which was fun but i was equally disappointed due to the fact none of my prints were up. It was just my paintings and don't get me wrong, i like my paintings but i thought my prints would have been stronger. I'm going to try and put them up sometime this weekend. There's quite a lot so it's going to take a bit of time.

So, now i've finished college and it seems like the end of an era, i'm going to have to start all over again at Grays, meet new people, forge new relationships. It's quite a scary thought. I've been practicing with using pencil again seeing as i haven't picked up a pencil in just over a year, so i completed a pencil drawing of bowie a few days ago, i'm getting better but i still have a long way to go, i'll also get that up aswell. Practice makes perfect. So i've got to work on a lot of sketchbooks, jot down my ideas and practice on things i'm not very good at, namely faces and the human figure. Ack!